2004 In Retrospect (An end of year lesson learned)
2004 was an interesting year. A year that included a number of highs and lows- my first promotion, a real move to the city, losing my first job, my brother's wedding (and the addition of a sister-in-law!), the death of my grandma M on Thanksgiving, 6 weeks of 50+ hour work weeks and the list could go on and on.
When my grandma passed away I was doing a lot of thinking about life. I was also feeling a little sad, as could be expected. Sad that I didn't get to say goodbye. Sad that it has been a long time since I had seen her. And as selfish as it sounds, I was even sad that for 16 years I had 6 grandparents and for 23 years I had at least 5 grandparents. Now I am 23 and down to 4 grandparents. Believe me, I realize this is selfish- this is more grandparents and more time with grandparents than most people have. But I couldn't help feeling sad. Sad that these grandparents (my stepdad's parents) won't see me get married, sad that these grandparents won't see great grandchildren (not mine of course, but I have two brothers who will most likely procreate at some time in the future). Sadness is a part of the grieving process. Experiences such as these make you stronger, encourage you to make some changes and reevaluate your thoughts and feelings.
Throughout the month of December one of my grandpas (dad's father) was in the hospital for almost 2 weeks and he was released too early (which seems to be happening way too much lately) and had to go back into the hospital for a few days, including Christmas Eve and Christmas Day. Since I didn't get to see that set of grandparents for the holidays, I opted to visit the following week when my grandpa was home again. I'm not a big fan of hospital visits.
I never liked New Year's-- people get drunk, people act stupid, people throw-up, things are broken, etc. Plus, why would I want to be in NYC on a day when everyone else flocks to the city? I had already decided I would be on LI for New Year's but never knew how the day would unfold.
It just so happened that my grandpa's first day home from the hospital was New Year's Eve. So I made plans to see that set of grandparents for lunch (Grandma had bologna, my favorite!). It was good to spend time with them without any other family around. I enjoyed the conversations and the time I was able to spend with them both.
Since I had already traveled almost an hour to their house, it was only proper for me to stop by my mom's parents house which was only 5 minutes away. (My grandma even had hot chocolate waiting for me when I got there!) I spent another few hours with that set of grandparents and then drove home just as it was getting dark. Enjoying this quality alone time with all of my grandparents was the best way to spend New Year's Eve. Family is the most important thing to me. The support, guidance and heritage they provide are irreplaceable. The end of the year is a great time to celebrate that you've been granted another year with the people you love.
As I was leaving my grandparents' house my grandad (mom's father) got teary, thanked me for visiting and said "the greatest gift we receive is the time we are granted to spend with one another; not everyone is as lucky and blessed as we have all been". As much as I already knew that, it took hearing it from my grandad's mouth for me to stop feeling sad and start being more grateful and appreciative of the time and memories I have with my older relatives. I don't really believe in resolutions, but in 2005 I plan to make a bigger effort to see my grandparents as much as possible. Spending a few hours of my time with them means a lot to me, but it means even more to them!
So as you begin the new year, take some time to appreciate the people in your life who make a difference. And call, or visit, your grandparents :-)
When my grandma passed away I was doing a lot of thinking about life. I was also feeling a little sad, as could be expected. Sad that I didn't get to say goodbye. Sad that it has been a long time since I had seen her. And as selfish as it sounds, I was even sad that for 16 years I had 6 grandparents and for 23 years I had at least 5 grandparents. Now I am 23 and down to 4 grandparents. Believe me, I realize this is selfish- this is more grandparents and more time with grandparents than most people have. But I couldn't help feeling sad. Sad that these grandparents (my stepdad's parents) won't see me get married, sad that these grandparents won't see great grandchildren (not mine of course, but I have two brothers who will most likely procreate at some time in the future). Sadness is a part of the grieving process. Experiences such as these make you stronger, encourage you to make some changes and reevaluate your thoughts and feelings.
Throughout the month of December one of my grandpas (dad's father) was in the hospital for almost 2 weeks and he was released too early (which seems to be happening way too much lately) and had to go back into the hospital for a few days, including Christmas Eve and Christmas Day. Since I didn't get to see that set of grandparents for the holidays, I opted to visit the following week when my grandpa was home again. I'm not a big fan of hospital visits.
I never liked New Year's-- people get drunk, people act stupid, people throw-up, things are broken, etc. Plus, why would I want to be in NYC on a day when everyone else flocks to the city? I had already decided I would be on LI for New Year's but never knew how the day would unfold.
It just so happened that my grandpa's first day home from the hospital was New Year's Eve. So I made plans to see that set of grandparents for lunch (Grandma had bologna, my favorite!). It was good to spend time with them without any other family around. I enjoyed the conversations and the time I was able to spend with them both.
Since I had already traveled almost an hour to their house, it was only proper for me to stop by my mom's parents house which was only 5 minutes away. (My grandma even had hot chocolate waiting for me when I got there!) I spent another few hours with that set of grandparents and then drove home just as it was getting dark. Enjoying this quality alone time with all of my grandparents was the best way to spend New Year's Eve. Family is the most important thing to me. The support, guidance and heritage they provide are irreplaceable. The end of the year is a great time to celebrate that you've been granted another year with the people you love.
As I was leaving my grandparents' house my grandad (mom's father) got teary, thanked me for visiting and said "the greatest gift we receive is the time we are granted to spend with one another; not everyone is as lucky and blessed as we have all been". As much as I already knew that, it took hearing it from my grandad's mouth for me to stop feeling sad and start being more grateful and appreciative of the time and memories I have with my older relatives. I don't really believe in resolutions, but in 2005 I plan to make a bigger effort to see my grandparents as much as possible. Spending a few hours of my time with them means a lot to me, but it means even more to them!
So as you begin the new year, take some time to appreciate the people in your life who make a difference. And call, or visit, your grandparents :-)
posted by Samara @ 7:56 PM
1 Comments:
At January 6, 2005 at 1:28 AM,
Anonymous said…
How right you are. My maternal grandmother died when I was 4, paternal grandfather when I was 8, paternal grandmother and maternal grandfather w/in 2 days of each other when I was 19. When I was getting married I cried often and hard each time I thought of them not being there. How lucky you are Sammy, to have so many people who love you, who have amazing stories and wisdom. I hope you are able to fulfill your resolution 10 times over and cherish them all. ((amy))
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